Bseware of friends

Beware of friends

Love and Friendship are  nothing more than Wishful thinking. 

Weak persons keep searching for ideal friends.

Who is an ideal friend?

Ideal Friend, as per the definition, are someone waiting to bail one out of difficult situation, without expecting a reward or reciprocation. 

• Many among us are timid and weak. They look around for good, strong persons as friends to protect themselves from the  difficulty life situation. 

• Rogues are looking for those weak people all the time., who are seeking such an ideal friend,, so as to exploit them.

• They would never realize that Such friends are is yet to be born.

• Everyone is searching for ideal, non-existent person. 
• No one has ever found any such person in their life. But, a relentless search for one continues. 

• There are a few good persons in every society all the time who would help anyone but he is not just your friend alone: but friend to every one. The do not look for reciprocation. They are strong themselves.  Buddha Jesus and Prophet cannot be called your friend

Are there any one among the readers who has a friend and he would help his friend, with unlimited financial assistance, in any trying life situation, (Ofcourse, without expecting a reward or reciprocation? I have not found one!

If there appears to be a person too close to such a definition,  and he appears to you can safely conclude, he is waiting for the right opportunity to profit from you.

Some may be ashamed to disclose their bad expenditure with friends. If they are close to you in some way they would confess.

(May I request those who understood that friendship is nothing more than a wishful thinking, can share their experience with friends for the benefit of the readers through their comments on this blog! ).


How does the man search for a friend? 

He looks around for some one in the workplace or living places who has the same opinion on issues that you value. 

If it matches with yours, you hope that he could be a friend that you are looking for. 

Who all seek friendship

1. There are a few  who are weak ,  timid and  afraid to face the world, all  alone) seeks  someone to protect him in bad situations. 

There are always several greedy, willy-nilly,  pretend to be a good Samaritan  and  sweet tonged hover-over,  bidding for the right time to hit.

2. Some one who in illiterate and rich looks for an educated as a friend, to elevate himself in the public eye. He too is vulnerable.

3. A timid guy with decent social position  looks for an association of a strong man to supplement and compliment his timidity. He is highly vulnerable.

The friendship breaks,   the moment it is found that any such expectations cannot be  not met from the other.  A help denied in time.

There are people who keeps track of weak people and pretend to share their values but they wait for a right opportunity to decamp with a loot.

A fantastic logic

 I have personally heard from a decently employed - Govt officer who rid of his friend of several lakhs of rupees, the following.   

A two decade old friend,  X, trusted this  officer friend and handed him with the cash of his new enterprise's operations. 

Within three months the FRIEND  walked-off with a loot, breaching the trust, of his friend: 

When asked why he did it to a friend so long and trusted him, his reply was quite logical   if not ethical. He replied:

"Friend is a person who trusts you".  Person who is not my friend does not trust me. 

So It is impossible to loot / deceive / expliut anyone who do not trust me.  So it is but logically alright to exploit any one  who trust you.

He sounded perfectly logical. 

Going through the news items, one find the number of persons in trouble by a friend is  more than those troubled by enemies. 

One who knows the weakness of a person  is a friend, not even his wife.

So anyone having a friend is vulnerable. 

Trouble from an enemy can be judged and protect ourselves but not a friend's.

Test for friendship

If you want to test your friend, seek an economic assitance. Friend would melt into the air!

Associate a friend in any economic activity, he will melt into the air along with with your Money.

If he did not, in the first instance, he will surely do anytime in future.

No two Equals cannot become friends.

Now a story about three friends.

Now, we will proceed to the story.

Story of three friends

There lived a Fox in the forest which befriended a 

donkey in a village adjoining the forest.

A lion in the forest was also a good friend of the 

fox. Let us analyze how there can be friendship 

between the three different species.

We will discover that the members of each circle will differ in their personalities and strengths. Some soft,  one "go-getter", a few with deep pockets a few tough guys. 

More importantly, a strong friend-circle will never have identical personalities.

Now, we will proceed to the story.

There lived a Fox in the forest which befriended a donkey in a village adjoining the forest.

A lion in the forest was also a good friend of the fox. Let us analyze how there can be friendship between the three different species.

benefit in associating itself with donkey. It is also true that Lions have no purpose served by its association with Fox.

Friendship between the three continues for long. A situation arose when the friends needed each other, for its survival.

The  lion  was  injured  during  a  hunting expedition. A few bones broke and a few other bones were dislocated. Lion could not hunt any more. Now both lion and fox starved without food.

The hungry lion asked the fox, if it could some how organize some food. Fox was equally in hunger. Suddenly, fox remembered the donkey in the village.  It explained the lion. The donkey’s is a useless animal. Its friendship got us no where. Now it is time when donkey’s friendship will come of use.

Lion was surprised. How come a lazy donkey helps us? Fox explained, “I will bring it here”. You knock it off in one blow. We both will eat it.

Lion agreed to that idea but demanded to know how to bring the donkey to the forest.

Fox replied, “It is quite simple”. “Any animal which live in the cities and villages have inherited the weaknesses from humans”.

“They attach great importance to friendship, which can be exploited”, reasoned the fox.

“Most importantly they will fall victims to flattery”. “These two are enough to bring them to forest.

Lion asked the fox, if it meant that animals living along side humans have no brain at all.  “You said it”, replied the fox and set itself on a journey to the village to meet the donkey.

In the village, when every one had slept off, the donkey was trying to find its food in the streets. Fox met the donkey and greeted.

As it was usual to the donkey, it started listing the listless woes of donkeys as specie. Fox, this time, was not a mute listener.

Fox assured the fox that there was always a way to come out of misery. Fox went on. The humans always exploit animals for their selfish ends. So, it is better to live only among animals. You have such soft grass abundant in the forest. You can enjoy them for free. There are no people in the forest to enslave animals.

Donkey was not that dumb, what fox thought it would be. “I know that, in forests there are several wild animals that would devour us”, observed the donkey. Fox said, “It is merely the rumor created by wicked men to ensure animals do not disappear into forest”. “Am I not meeting you often? Am I not living in the forest? Which wild animal did it devour me?”

Donkey was not fully convinced, as such. Fox, realizing that its plan A did not work with the donkey, pulled out, its plan B. “There is an acute shortage of male donkeys in the forest”. The fox continued.  “A hand some donkey, like you, will be entitled for at the minimum, three beautiful and healthy female donkeys in the forest”.  “As a package deal, you get free food and no hard labor”. You are one of the good souls. You deserve this and much more. Make a visit once and you will know all by yourself. If you don’t like, the fox assured that, I will reach you back to this village.

Fox set out on a long journey lasting several hours. It was hungry week and tired. The fox explained the donkey about the beautiful life in the forest, all the way.

Finally, the donkey arrived into the dark den. It could not see anything inside. It would take some time before it can see around.

The hungry lion, took a giant leap on the donkey only to miss it by a few inches. The donkey realized that everything is not all right. It ran towards the entry to the den and started walking slowly.

The lion was apologetic.

Fox assured the lion. “After all the donkey has no other place to go. After all it has no or negligible brains (ability to think), like the humans. 

It would come along with me even if I cheat hundred times. Okay, let us make a second attempt.

“You know, I have become weak without food. That is how, I missed the target. But now, it needs a little while before I make another attempt on it. I know, you are clever and you would bring, again the brainless beast for a feast”.

“In the intervening time, I will go to the nearby lake drink some water and make myself fresh and strong before I come back. Wait for me till then”.  Saying so, the lion vanished into the dense trees near its den towards the lake. 

The fox followed the foot prints of the donkey and located it. The donkey was in terribly bad mental and physical state following the long journey to the jungle followed by a socking incident inside the den.

Fox, with a surprise all over its face, demanded to know from the donkey, as what made it run from the den. Donkey said, “A huge object fell close to a place where it stood. I came running to save myself.

The replied, “It is merely his fear and there was no danger to its life”. One of the three donkeys was waiting to meet you. 

On seeing you, instantly, it fell in love. In her anxiety she came rushed towards you. When I looked around for you and you were gone”.

Donkey looked at the fox in disbelief. Now the fox decided to play with the sentiments. Fox new sentiments works with humans. So it should work with donkeys too.

“I have a bad news for you”, said the fox. Soon after you left, all the three female donkeys felt that you do not like them at all. So they have decided to commit suicide.

Fox said, “In the forest, we animals fear that the ghosts of such liitfe will haunt you and trouble you throughout your life. “Better, you  come  back  and  get  married  to  the three donkeys and lead a royal life”, the fox concluded.

The weak and worn out donkey found no other better solution than to follow the fox.

The fox waited in the den for a while. He saw the fox trembling in fear. Donkeys might have a strong legs and could give a might kick when in normal health. When the donkey is weak, it won’t need a lion to kill it, thought the fox.

Slowly the fox bit the ears of the donkey. The fox guessed it right. That  was  enough  for  the  donkey  to  faint. 

The fox ate up the donkey’s brain, before the lion reached.

Lion which arrived in the den a little later was shocked and angry to find the donkey’s brain was not there in the place.

The clever fox, reminded the lion the fact that not only the humans but every other specie living in the vicinity of humans also did not have brains!

Lion found, the fox was always right.

Lion gave the lion’s share to its trusted friend and adviser the fox and enjoyed a nice feast.

• FRIEND FRIEND FRIEND

Stories from the real world!

(1)   Those who read / familiar  about Spirituality might know Ramana maharishi or Thiruvannamalai. They might also know of  Paul Brunton very well.

Paul Brunton is the pen name of  Raphael Hurst  a British theosophist and spiritualist.  

He married Karen Augusta Tuttrup in 1921, with whom he had a son, Kenneth Thurston Hurst (b. 1923). He (Paul Brunton)  became a spiritualist under the guidance of Ramana maharishi.

After his wife had an affair with his friend Leonard Gill, the marriage was ended in divorce in 1926, but Hurst remained on friendly terms with his ex-wife and with Gill. He was a bookseller and journalist, and wrote under various pseudonyms ....   .....   .......

(2)  How does it feel like being deceived by your closest friend?

A- G: it is true or i am living in a wrong world ? (Written in Oct 2015)

You can never believe that the closest person in your life can betray you .

Or may be you don't want to believe just to protect yourself from the heartwrenching pain.

Or may be you get so numb after the betrayal that you lose the ability to feel anything.

Anyways you asked how it feels. So this was it. 

Also thank that person (the betrayer) who has taught you the most important lesson in life:. 

If you are taking a leap of faith , do prepare for a fall.

We tend to forget the fall part. But life teach us the hard way. 

Anyway remember...

It's not the wound that killed Caesar. Seeing his confidante   (Brutus) do it killed him.

So..Chose the people around you wisely.

3.   Betrayal by friends

You go through the 5 stages of grief. 

Denial, Anger, Bargaining, Depression and Acceptance. 

First, you do not believe that your closest friend has done it. 

Second, you feel anger against your friend and also towards self for being friends with such a person. 

Third, you start questioning the situation and the circumstances that made him take such a step, probably giving him a benefit of doubt. 

Then you get depressed and feel sad that such a thing happened to you. 

Lastly you accept the fact that you were deceived and move on with life.

Most of us do not add the 6th step to the above  five stages that is, Forgiveness. 

We need to forgive such people, because it it their nature.  their character. You choose them. 

All you need to do is, learn out of that experience and ensure that it doesn't happen with you again.